@ALBUM: The Presidents of The United States of America
by The Presidents of The United States of America

1995

In a few places, questionable lyrics are indicated as such:
This is a line with [questionable lyrics](?) in a song

Big thanks to the unknown person contributing to the first file
to this ftp-site, and also to djbrock@.bsc.edu, who also had typed
in the whole album, and thanks to others typing in their versions of
the songs and putting them on the WWW at:
http://panther.bsc.edu/~djbrock/potusa/lyrics/lyrics.html, and also
a big thanks to jlee@bdt.com, http://www.bdt.com/home/jlee/23.html#lump
and a very big thank you to all other that I forgot to mention. ;-)

I downloaded all the text I could find, and compared them to what my
ears believed, while I was listenig to the Presidents... at least
10 times, correcting my own and others mistake.

This is how far I got:

 1. Kitty                       - OK
 2. Feather Pluckn              - OK
 3. Lump                        - ONE spelling question
 4. Stranger                    - OK
 5. Boll Weevil                 - TWO marked 'questionable lyrics'
 6. Peaches                     - OK
 7. Dune Buggy                  - OK
 8. We Are Not Going to Make It - OK
 9. Kick Out The Jams           - OK? (See comment below)
10. Body                        - OK
11. Back Porch                  - ONE marked 'questionable lyric'
12. Candy                       - TWO marked 'questionable lyrics'
13. Naked and Famous            - OK

Comments...
3. Lump - ONE spelling question
     The spelling of paranas/piranhas (I've seen several different spellings)
     By the way, What does it mean???
9. Kick Out The Jams - OK?
     First line, not marked, "to midnight" might be "'til bidnight"

If you all sharpen your ears, and send in comments to my alternative
e-mail adress da95gpa@ing.umu.se, I promise to send in an updated
version of this lyrics, with all errors corrected and all questinons
removed. :-)

By the way - 'OK' doesn't mean the text is OK
- It only means that I think it is OK. :-)       /Gunnar, page@ts.umu.se

@SONG: Kitty

Little bag of bones been out all night
Little bag of bones been out all night
Can you hear him scratchin at the screen door
Can you hear him sratchin at the screen door
Little bag of bones been out all night

He needs some pettin' and lovin' on his head
He needs some pettin' and lovin' on his rain soaked hide
He's circlin' 'round my ankle
He's circlin' 'round my ankle
He needs some pettin' and lovin' on his hide, hey kitty won't ya come inside

Kitty at my foot and I want to touch it  (8x)

Pussy purrin' and lookin' so satisfied
Pussy purrin' and lookin' so satisfied
Lost in his little yellow round eye
Lost in his little yellow round eye
Pussy purrin' and lookin' so satisfied

Kitty rear up and scratched me through my jeans
Kitty rear up and scratched me through my jeans
Fuck you kitty you're gonna spend the night
Fuck you kitty you're gonna spend the night
Fuck you kitty you're gonna spend the night
OUT SIDE

Kitty at my foot and I want to touch it  (8x)

Touch it 
Want to touch it  (7x)

Kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty touch it
Kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty touch it
Kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty touch it
Kitty at my foot and I want to touch it

@SONG: Feather Pluckn

But that's totally
But that's totally

Billions of birdies squakin' out loud
Talking in code to clams in the clouds
They send a secret message, they send it by worm
So vibratin' spiders will receive the word
But that's totally feather pluckin' insane

Ten million monkeys all pick up guitars
Nobody taught them how
Five thousand fishies rocking really really really hard
Nobody taught them how
Check out chickie driving piggy's little blue car
Nobody taught him how

Flies like to fly 'cause they don't like to stay
They're buzzing in the ears of a chicken all day
Chicken understand and he peck out the code
Send a subsonic signal through the snot
In the middle of an elephant's long wet cold gray nose
But that's totally feather pluckin' insane

Ten million monkeys all pick up guitars
Nobody taught them how
Five thousand froggies rockin' really really really hard
Nobody taught them how
Check out chickie driving piggy's little blue car
Nobody taught him how

Everybody supernova
Everybody supernova
Everybody supernova
Everybody supernova

@SONG: Lump

Lump sat alone in a boggy marsh
Totally motionless except for her heart
Mud flowed up into lump's pajamas
She totally confused all the passing [paranas/piranhas](???)

She's lump, she's lump
She's in my head
She's lump, she's lump, she's lump
She might be dead

Lump lingered last in line for brains
And the one she got was sorta rotten and insane
Small thing so sad that birds could land
Is lump fast asleep or rock'n out with the band?

She's lump, she's lump
She's in my head
She's lump, she's lump, she's lump
She might be dead

Lump was limp and lonely and needed a shove
Lump slipped on a kiss and tumbled into love
She spent her twenties between the sheets
And life limped along at subsonic speeds

She's lump, she's lump
She's in my head
She's lump, she's lump, she's lump
She might be dead

Is this lump out of my head?
I think so
Is this lump out of my head?
I think so
Is this lump out of my head?
I think so
Is this lump out of my head?

@SONG: Stranger

You lynyrd skynyrd hat and me little kitty
Sat across with the velvet jacket
Wild orange hair and dark dark eyes
I galked like a 12 year old smitten
Carla the stripper straight from LA
You seem cool for a naked chick in a booth
Let's be pals someday
In other words, put some clothes on and call me

I saw you
It was incredible

Slim relaxed buyin' wine at the QFC
On a snowy Saturday night
Black pearls and I swear you were drinking beer
You were the red head behind the counter there
I'm the one who fell out of his chair there
You had your drycleaning and I think you're dreaming

I saw you
It was incredible
Mumbled these words at you
unintelligible

Ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma
Ma ma yeah who who, hey, um, eh, what time is it?

@SONG: Boll Weevil

Let me tell you 'bout a friend of mine
His name's Boll Weevil check him out
He spends all day on his big butt
And he don't ever ever get outside
I come to visit
I bring some sunshine
And I just spread it all over the fire
He's stuck on his big couch
Stuck in his big shell
He looks at the TV and he's all right
I come from the Drug [Lo'](?) the local drug store
bug is a fly, baby, he's never on time

And I wonder
Boll Weevil why don't ya get out of your home?
He said I'm comfortable here I don't wanna move I don't wanna leave
I said, Boll Weevil get right out of your home
Goodbye I gotta stay up, some other day, bye bye, gotta go asleep and
Let the tube shine
Let the tube shine
Let the tube shine
Let the tube shine

Now, I'd tell you about Boll Weevil, but that bug is just too scary
he's sittin' there all alone
I tried to coax him out with my chocolate pie
but he would not move a muscle when I tried
To make him see that the sun is shining outside  (5x)

Boll Weevil get right out of your home
Boll Weevil get right out of your home
Boll Weevil get right out of your home
Boll Weevil get right out of your home

Now, I would tell you about Boll Weevil but that bug is just too scary
he's sittin' there all alone
I tried to coax him out with my chocolate pie
but he would not move a muscle when I tried
To make him see that the sun is shining outside
To make him see that the sun is shining out
That the sun is shining outside (9x)

Make him see the sun
Make him see the sun
Make him see the goddamn sun

[(Come on, little buggy, who's the little bug?)](?)

@SONG: Peaches

Moving to the country, gonna eat a lot of peaches
I'm Moving to the country, I'm gonna eat me a lot of peaches
I'm Moving to the country I'm gonna eat a lot of peaches
Moving to the country I'm gonna eat a lot of peaches

Peaches come from a can
They were put there by a man
In a factory downtown

And if I head my little way
I'd eat peaches everyday
Sun-soaked bulges in the shade

Moving to the country, I'm gonna eat a lot of peaches
Moving to the country, I'm gonna eat a lot of peaches
I'm Moving to the country, gonna eat a lot of peaches
Moving to the country, gonna eat a lot of peaches

I took a little nap where the roots all twist
Squished your rotten peach in my fist
And dreamed about you, woman
I poked my finger down inside
Make a little room for an ant to hide
Nature's candy in my hand or can or pie

Millions of peaches, peaches for me
Millions of peaches, peaches for free
Millions of peaches, peaches for me
Millions of peaches, peaches for free... Look out!

Millions of peaches peaches for me
Millions of peaches peaches for free
Millions of peaches peaches for me
Millions of peaches, peaches for free... Look out!

@SONG: Dune Buggy

A little blind spider took the wheel
Navigating grass blades completely by feel
Got a sassy chassis, sparkle in the sun
All four small bald fat tires
Rocking through the sand and burnin' up

Little dune buggy in the sand
Little blue dune buggy in my hand

I got a
Rubber band motor hummin' on the beach ready for fun
Quit spinning that web and come out and play in the sun
Eight thimble sized cylinders to be as smooth as you please
Spider's badass fat ol' abdomen stuck in the bucket seat

Little dune buggy in the sand
Little blue dune buggy in my hand

Squishy transmission was caught in drive
Spiderman squintin' at the sand and the sky
Spiderwoman in the front seat, screamin' "Go, go, go!"
He's riding the accelerator down to the floor with his fuzzy little toe-oh-oh-oh

Little dune buggy in the sand
Little blue dune buggy in my hand

Little blue dune buggy (8x)

Little... blue... dune buggy

@SONG: We Are Not Going to Make It

We're not gonna make it, no no
We're not gonna make it
'Cuz there's a million better bands
With a million better songs
Singers who can drum
Singers who can sing

Deep in my heart
I do believe

We're not gonna make it, no no
We're not gonna make it
'Cuz we don't have the talent
And we don't have the time
We don't have the patience
And we don't know how to rhyme

Deep in my heart
I do believe

We're not gonna make it, no no
We're not gonna make it
I said no no no no
no no no no no no no no no
no no no no
no no no no no no no no no
no no no no
no no no no no no no no no
no no no no

We're not gonna make it

@SONG: Kick Out The Jams

Well, I've been elected to rock your asses to midnight
Well, this is my term and I shaved off my perm but it's alright
I solemnly swear to uphold the Constitution
Got a rock'n'roll problem, well we got a solution
So let me be who I am
And let me kick out the jams, yeah
Kick out the jams
I done kicked 'em out

Well, I've been selected to orbit the planet in a rocket
   (in a rocket)
I'm going to Mars I've got a message for the poodle in your pocket
   (In my pocket)
Mission Control, calling supernova
The hotline's rocking you can come on over
And let us be who we am
And let us kick out the jams, yeah
Kick out the jams
We done kicked 'em out

@SONG: Body

Little salamander
Where did you go?
Edge of the yard
I found you, you know
All brown and hard

I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body
I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body

She goes smooth through my body, yeah
Through my body she goes smooth
She goes smooth through my body, yeah
Through my body she goes smooth

Little killer froggy
Where did you hop?
Under the entertainment center
Realize you just couldn't stop
The worms found a hole in your booty they could enter and

I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body
I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body

You go smooth through my body, yeah
Through my body you go smooth
You go smooth through my body, yeah
Through my body you go smooth

Hey little lizard
Where did you slink
Left your cage door open
Under the basement sink
The dripping water made your molded body eyes open, and

I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body
I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body

I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body
I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body

I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body
I can't get your body out of my mind
I can't get your body

@SONG: Back Porch

Happy with no teeth
Happy here in hibernation
Slurpin' on a peach
Starin' at the situation
Kitty at my foot
Meowin out a conversation
Rocking back and forth
That's my only destination

Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that old man is me
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that

Got a
Two string on my lap
Total subsonic vacation
Got a chicken on the drums
Pounding out a perfect prescription
Got twenty little worms
All plugged into amplification
Got fifteen hundred bass-drum-luggin' bug-eyed monkeys
All arrivin at the station

Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that old man is me
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that

I'm sitting on the back porch kicking my legs back
rocking in my rocking chair just sitting there
[all of the](?) little back porch is about to fall apart, so
I think I might repair it
Just as I'm thinkin' about repairin' it some little friends come along
with some two string, one string, no string guitars
and they plug 'em all in to the back porch
and they sit around playing all their favorite songs
they kicking back, feeling real good, real fine, real full of the wine
and everything's fine, everything's beautiful, everything's great
I just feel so good, you know I'm 70 years old and I'm slurpin
everything through a straw, but I'm the

Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that old man is me
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch
And that

@SONG: Candy

Well, sugar's only sweetness
Salt is ocean tears
And you were my only weakness
For years and years and years

You little yellow sweetie
You were hiding in a jar
Now my mind is gone completely
Take off the lid and there you are

You're my candy
Candy

Well the devil, she made sweet candy
Took six days and nights to dream
On the seventh day she rested
Woke up early and made ice cream

Now the devil she must be a dentist
With deep jawbreaker eyes
Red rope hair, gumdrop lips
Cotton candy thighs

You're my candy
Candy

[Chocolate Lava](?) stole my body
And [after they/aftertaste](?) stole my mind
Left me dangling down defenseless
And then sweet candy, she said goodbye

Now my teeth are worn and useless
My eyes too sunk to see
My tongue swole up to twice its size
And all I wanna do is eat

Candy
My candy
My candy
My candy
Suckin on candy

@SONG: Naked and Famous

I can't explain glacial motion
Or why Los Angeles don't drop into the ocean
I can't unfold the layers of mystery
Or piece together the tragedy of history

'Cuz
Those lucky suckers
They don't have to work
Big 3-D billboards and big
Thirty foot Smurfs

n' everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked
And famous

n' I met a poet, said she didn't like the smell of it
Then took her clothes off in a restaurant for the hell of it
I met a DJ who lived in seclusion
Reality and sobriety were her only delusions, and

Those lucky bastards
They didn't have to work
Big 3-D billboards and big
Thirty foot Smurfs

n' everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked
And famous

Don't get a nosebleed
Don't get upset
We can't be naked and famous just yet
There's a big ol' dollar sign on the sunset strip
And you can send your friend a postcard, it ain't worth the trip

Everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked
Everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked
Everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked

n' everybody wants to be naked and famous
Everybody wants to be just like me I'm naked
And famous