Bad Attitude Chili
Last updated 6/12/2012 1:05:49 AM. Recipe ID 30994. Report a problem with this recipe.
Title: Bad attitude chili
Yield: 6 Servings
2 lb Pork roast cut into 1"
2 lb Cheap ground beef (You'll
-need the fat. This isn't
1/2 c GOOD chile powder (Your
-local supermarket brand
-tastes like cardboard)
1 HUGE onion; roughly chopped
1 Head garlic; minced
8 New Mexican green chiles;
-roasted; peeled, seeded,
1 tb Hot Hungarian paprika (This
-is legal. Paprika is a
1 tb Ground cumin
4 Beef boullion cubes
1 cn (28-oz) crushed tomatoes
-(Dont' worry. You won't
-even know they are there.)
1 Bottle amber Mexican beer
-(Dos Equiis; Noche Buena,
-or any Oktoberfest will
1/4 c Bourbon (This is one of
-those things that just
2 Squares bitter baker's
-chocolate (Not as weird as
Salt to taste
Here is the recipe for my chili that appears in BeeR the magazine.
I grew up all over the place and was introduced to hot food at a
young age. My wanderings took me to Texas for a while. It was there I
learned that true chili is not some form of bastardized spaghetti
sauce or that abomination eaten with zeal in Cincinati.
Chili is basic food. It is, in fact, one of the four food groups
along with coffee, bagels, and beer. Meat, onions, chiles. What could
be simpler, right? But then why is the perfect chili recipe so
ellusive? Well, I'll tell ya. It's because people get too far away
from the basics and mix in influences from cultures that have no
business making chili. Cultures like New York and that large flat
area between Pittsburgh and Denver. There are two styles of chili;
Texas and New Mexico. Bad Attitude is from Texas.
One aside. Watch the spelling. C-H-I-L-I is make with chile.
C-H-I-L-E is (1) God's greatest gift to humans, (2) a country named
after our favorite fruit, and (3) how mothers pronounce, " Chile!
Gitchyer butt over here!"
This recipe comes from years of Friday afternoons dedicated to
cards-beer-blow-off-steam sessions while at dental school in south
Texas. We used venison and pork, but any vertabrate is fine.
(Armadillo is not allowed in Texas as it is the Official State
Critter and has been granted asylum from the chili pot.) Vegetarian
chili? Is that like jumbo shrimp? Military intelligence? Legal
ethics? Painless dentist?
Chili is not supposed to be blow you head off hot. I have two
criteria for proper heat. (1) I should sweat under my eyes. (2) I
should be able to eat the whole bowl without stopping to cool off.
There is supposed to be a lot of chile flavor and no tomato flavor.
This can only be had through high quality chile powder and fresh
To bean or not to bean? That is the question for people that like to
discuss things like the meaning of life. Or how many angels can do the
Cotton Eyed Joe on the head of a pin. Or is there a limit to Deion
$anders' ego. If you are going to bean, pintos and black are good.
Kidney beans are a sin.
In time, this recipe has taken on life of its own. It has been know to
change major weather patterns, cement faltering relationships, depose
minor dictatorships, and affect the outcome of the Superbowl.
Remember to use its power for good.
Sautee 1/4 of the garlic and onions until translucent. Add 1/4 of the
meat, chile powder and brown. Salt the meat while cooking. Put into
your chili pot. Cast iron is best. Repeat until all the meat is done.
Put the rest of the ingredients in you chili pot and simmer for for a
As in any recipe, the amount of ingredients is variable. Add more of
anything you want, especially chiles.
You now have the power. Use it wisely. The eyes of Texas are upon you!
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