Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (Terran Ingredients)
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Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (Terran Ingredients)
  Alcohol    Cocktails    SciFi  
Last updated 6/12/2012 1:28:42 AM. Recipe ID 64189. Report a problem with this recipe.
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      Alcohol - liquor, booze, drinks, grog, moonshine, spirits, whiskey, Pan Galactic 
Gargle Blaster.

      During their travels through the galaxy, the galactic hitchhiker will sometimes 
find that some item that is desired may be unavailable, so it will have to be replaced 
with what is available. According to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the Pan 
Galactic Gargle Blaster is the best drink in existence.

      According to Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, it was invented by 
the President of the Galaxy (Imperial Galactic Government), Zaphod Beeblebrox. 
Unfortunately, the ingredients for it are not available on some planets. This being the 
case on Planet Earth (Terra), a galactic hitchhiker known as TimeLoyd endeavored to 
create one using Terran ingredients.

      With the help of some buckskinners who will drink anything that is in a jug (at a 
gathering recreating those of the early 19th Century mountain men), he created a 
mixture similar to a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, after which, the bottom fell out of 
the jug. Note: Unless you are an android with an indestructible stomach, liver and 
digestive system, handle very, very carefully, and be sure to keep it away from fire. 
It has been suggested as a possible spaceship fuel.

      To make a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster using Terran ingredients:

      Take the liquid contained in a 200 ml bottle of EverClear to remind you that your 
head will be clear forever if you drink too many Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters, and that 
your brain will clear of anything soon after you start drinking some, if not before.

      Into it, slowly pour a 750 ml bottle of Bombay Sapphire to remind you of the 
marvelous beauty of the old Santraginean seas, or an equal amount of Jeremiah Weed in 
acknowledgement of what has happened to the Santraginean Seas and their lifeforms.

      Now add 750 ml of Cold Wild Turkey, letting it run into the mixture as we run 
through life to remind us of all the lifeforms we meet and experience while hitchhiking 
through the galaxy.

      Speedily stirring, add 375 ml of Herradua Tequila, mixing it in to commemorate 
the galactic hitchhikers who died of pleasure among the vapors and gasses in the 
marshes of Fallia.

      Over the bowl of a silver spoon, let flow 1 liter of rum in memory of the 
waterfalls and their glorious rainbows encountered on your journeys through the galaxy 
of life.

      Next, drop in the worm found in a bottle of Musquil, watching it dissolve into 
the mixture. If the bottom falls out and the worm survives, drink at your own risk.

      Finally, sprinkle into the mixture some Gatorade to commemorate the lifeforms 
which have vanished and are becoming extinct, both sentient and non-sentient, 
especially those most in need of aid.

      If this many Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters are too many for the number of people 
you think you are, mix together the following amounts of ingredients as described above 
for a single serving.
         1. 1 oz. EverClear
         2. 4 oz. Bombay Sapphire or Jeremiah Weed
         3. 4 oz. Cold Wild Turkey
         4. 2 oz. Herredura Tequila
         5. 5 oz. Rum

            1     worm from bottle of Mezcla

         7. 2 oz. Gatorade 

      This makes one approximately 18 ounce Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. The reason 
this drink seems so large is that Zaphod Beeblebrox has two heads, so when he created 
it, it came out to 9 ounces per head, so both were happy.

      Before drinking, eat one olive to create a sweetness in it which is not there.

      Drink very, very extremely carefully at your own risk, and remember where your 
towel is (if you can).

      Submitter's note: This recipe has been placed into the public domain by the 
author, and was previously published in "Mostly Harmless," the fanzine of the ZZ9 
Plural Zed Alpha fan club, Brighton, England. 

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Recipe ID 64189 (Apr 17, 2006)

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