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            HOW TO CARD SHIT, WHEN YOU STILL LIVE WITH YOUR PARENTS

                                 by  L.E. Pirate

                      >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<<
                        -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
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     HAVING PARENTS
     --------------

       Ok...I'm still living at home, as most of you nerds.
    Now, I'm sure many of you have wondered "HOW THE HELL AM I
    GONNA PULL OFF THAT CARDED 20 MEGGER?"  I know damn well
    that some of you have parents as smart as a fuckin' tree
    stump.  But for intelligent people, like my parents, they
    aren't gonna fuckin' believe that the carded hard drive is
    the modem. "Yeah, sure mom, it's the modem, remember, uh 
    when we went to Zooliggerz Department Store and I begged for
    one? huh? do ya???". Well, maybe my mother would believe that
    but it just wouldn't hold steady with my dad,  he's an 
    electrical engineer and works around computers all the time,
    you can't say shit like "yeah, uh... that thing you've never
    seen before? oh... uh... that's Jimmies, yeah, he, uh, gave
    it to me".  I know that some people do that shit, I got a 
    unidisk from some dude who didn't care, and my parents believed
    it too.  Anyways, how do you get away with it?  Well, I suggest
    you practice carding small shit, like knives and bb guns and
    shit.  Also, read as many carding files before you follow any
    instructions, this is for the beginner, but I assume that you
    understand the "basics".  Practice going and picking them up,
    small things, your parents usually never notice.  If your parents
    never go in your room, then splurge, card yourselves a bunch 
    of sluts to work you over everyday, but if your mom isn't a yuppie
    bitch, then it's gonna be tough....After hours of day dreaming in
    school,  I came across this method...


    CARDING BIG SHIT AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT
    -----------------------------------------

    ok..at this point, before carding ANYTHING.  Tell your parents
    that you have a friend in California (or some other far away
    place, like I live in S.NJ so I usually say Nebraska or something).
    who is starting a computer business in a local shopping mall.
    Tell them months before that you want a 20 meg hard drive, keep
    telling them (you'll probably get it for xmas, but you can't wait
    that long), in no time, they'll be sick of it.  So you say that
    the dude is gonna give you a hard drive as long as you advertise
    his company on systems all over the country (if your parents don't
    know you phreak, then just say "locally"), for the small price
    of a hard drive.  You must have a friend set up in a state far away
    in order to really do this.  If your parents do not believe you,
    usually they do, but if they don't, give them the number of your
    friend (he must sound older, no squeaky voces), and say it is the
    computer store in the "mall".  He must answer the phone like this: 
    "This is the didly-squat computer store, this is Joe, may I help you?"
    If your parents start asking questions, the dude on the other end 
    cannot be nervous, he has to see the thing through, even in the tough
    spots.  If your parents buy it, then you're home free.  Let "Joe"
    explain to your parents the concept of the deal.  Also, I'd throw in
    an HST 9600 for good effect, as a "free gift".  But you don't have
    to tell them that.  You can only pull this off once, unless you have
    ultra-stupid parents.  But I'd cash in real good cuz you cannot use
    this as much as you'd like to.  If your parents work, then you do
    not have to worry, card everything as usual, and go pick it up at the
    drop site.  If your dad works, and your mom doesn't.  Go outside and
    ride your bike (how cute), skateboard, work on your car, kill dogs,
    spray paint the road, etc.  anything, as long as you're in front of
    your house, and your mother knows it.  Go pick up the shit, and go to
    your mother (who's probably in the kitchen, heh.) and say "oh goodie,
    look what just came!  Hot dog!  The nice UPS man just delivered it!"
    and open it, and say "hey look, a 9600 baud modem! wow!" and go to 
    your room (where the computer is, unless you keep it in the family 
    room..ha) and set it up.  That's it!  It works, and it is very
    sensible.  If you have any questions or comments about this file,
    contact me at Dragonfire Private, number at the end of this.

    ====================================================================
    The author of this file is not responsible for jack shit in this file
    or how the reader uses the contents to his/her jollies.  Fuck your
    self if you get caught, and if you call me crying, I'll kill you.
    Also, don't card to the same place twice.  Read all of The Metallian's
    files on carding.  Thanks, and have an average day.

    ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
    Thanks to The Blade, The Metallian, The Simulator, Dial Tone, 
    The Bronze Rider, The Snowman, Lustfer Death, Bungalow Bill,
    The Tempest, The Tailpipe, Swamp Rat, Franken Gibe, Frontal Nudity,
    The Rocker, The Rogue, Brain Tumor, and last but not least, TRAXSTER
    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
    Dragonfire Private.....................................609/424-2606
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 (c)1987  cDc communications  by L.E. Pirate                        10/20/87-22
 All Rights Worth Shit