Parking Meter Theft
                                     by
                                  THE DICK

Ok here we go. Let's take a walk down the street. We're a little broke
today I see. Well... here's a little something I devised a few years back
that actually had a nice payoff....

Parking meters out where I live average about 15 to 20 dollars each. The
effort to get into them is fairly minimal. The key is SPEED. I had to
get in there... get the cash... and split! It's pretty fucking simple to
do too.

My method only works on certain types of meters. Have a look at this diagram.
                ______________              ________
               /  __________  \            /        \
               | | VIOLATION| |           /|        |\
               | |__________| |           \|        |/
               |      |       |            |       /
               |     <o>      |            |       |
               \______|_______/ <-hinge-> .|___    |
                \            /             |   |   |
                 |          |              |   |   |
                 \          /              |   |   |
   hit HERE-----> \    0   / <---lock---> 0|   *   |
                   \______/                 \_/___/
                     |  |                    |   |
                     |  |                    |   |
                 front view                side view

Now the reason it's something that's gotta be done quick is because my
method makes alot of noise. I would take a crowbar or a baseball bat or
another long hard object, and strike the meter on each side a couple of
times... right in line with the lock. The whole bottom panel would pop
open to reveal a red can. I had to take that can and run... and do
another meter somewhere else a little bit later. Now I was stuck with
this red can... with a big lock on its top. I had to take my crowbar
and bash and pry the can open as best as i could... and shake the change
out of it. That's something which is best done in the privacy of your own
home...


Anyhow... that's the deal... if you are confused... forget it you'll never
figure it out.




-the DICK