,,,,      ,,,,   ,,,, ,,,,,     ,,,,
                  ;;;;      ;;;;   ;;;; ;;;;;;;   ;;;;
                  ;;;;      ;;;;   ;;;;     ;;;;  ;;;;
                  ;;;;      ;;;;   ;;;; ,,,,;;;´  ;;;;
                  ;;;;      ;;;;   ;;;; ;;;;;´´   ;;;;
                  ;;;;      ;;;;   ;;;;           ;;;;
                  ´;;;;, ,;;;;;´   ;;;;           ;;;;
                   ´;;;; ;;;;;´    ;;;;           ;;;; ;;;;;
                      ´´ ´´´       ´´´´           ´´´´ ´´´´´

       ______________________United Phone Losers______________________       

                         DTMF Songs For Fun And Sex                         
                                  by linear                                  
    _        ______________________     _  ___________________          _    
    _07/23/99______________________Issue_13___________________UPL013.txt_    


<rbcp> DOS? come on, it's 1999.  Half the people visiting your site probably
       don't know what DOS is.

      _______________http://www.unitedphonelosers.zzn.com_____________       


   ----- In This Issue -----
I. Introduction
II. Explanation
III. DTMF Songs You To Play.... Wholesome Family Fun!
        a. "My Country 'Tis Of Thee..."
        b. "Strangers in the night, Exchanging glances"
        c. "Here comes the bride all dressed in white"
        d. "London bridge is falling down falling down falling down london"
        e. "Twinkle twinkle little star"
        f. "Ring around a rosy a pocket full of posies ashes ashes we all..."
        g. "mister sandman bring me a dream...."
        h. "Marry Had A Little Lamb..."
        i. "Hot Cross Buns..."
IV. Disclaimer


   ----- Introduction -----
	So, you're bored off your ass with nothing better to do, but read UPL
issues, eh? Well, this one sucks just like the rest of them, so get over it.
We switched from DOS format back to a Windows format. Only THIS Windows 
format doesn't suck ass like our first two issues. Well, i decided to write 
this shitty issue because I haven't written one in a while.
	Anyway, this file is all about making music with your touch-tone 
phone's keypad. Now you can impress your friends, and all the chicks, and 
even get laid at parties. Yes, laid at parties! NOTE: You will NOT get laid
at parties, nor do you have friends to impress.

   ----- Explaination -----
	Well, what are DTMF tones you ask? DTMF tones are the tones that your
touch-tone phone's keypad makes. What is your touch-tone phone's keypad you
ask? Goddamn you're dumb, kid! Go to your phone. Pick it up. You should see
something like this:
                                  [1][2][3]
                                  [4][5][6]
                                  [7][8][9]
                                  [*][0][#]

	Now, if you still don't know what I'm talking about, hit yourself. 
Harder! HARDER! Okay, that's better. Now, by pushing these touch tone keys in
certain order at variating speeds, you can play old stupid songs and annoy, 
erm, I mean impress, your friends with your new k-r4d n34t-0 31337-0 skill.

   ----- Songs To Play -----
	Here are the only ones I could find for you guys. If you wanna waste
your time learning how to play DTMF music, I'm sure there's many losers just
like you out there that made a DTMF Music Website or something. I suggest you
find it. And then tell my loser ass about it. Anyway, here's what i have:



My coun-try 'tis of thee Sweet Land of li-be-ty of thee i sing

5    5  6     1  5    9    0     0  8   0  8 4  8    4  2  4



Stran-gers in the night Ex-chang-ing glan-ces

  4    8    8  4    8   4    8    6    8   4



Here comes the bride all dressed in white

  1    3    3    3    1     9     6   6



Lon-don bridge is fall-ing down fall-ing down fall-ing down london 

6    9    6     8  7    8   6    1    4    5    7   8   9      6



bridge is fall-ing down my fair la-dy

   6   8   7    8    6  8   6    0  4





Twin-kle twin-kle lit-tle star

  1   1    9   9   0   0   9



Ring a-round a ros-y a poc-ket full of pos-ies ash-es ash-es we all

  8  8  8    6  0  4 4  8  8    8   6   0  4    0  4   0   4  4  0



fall down

 0    4





mis-ter sand-man bring me a dream

 4   2    6   2    6    6  2   6



Mar-ry had a lit-tle lamb, lit-tle lamb, lit-tle lamb

 3  5  7   5  3  3    3     5  5     5    3   3    3


hot crossed buns, etc....

321 321 1111 2222 321


   ----- Disclaimer -----
	The United Phone Losers and/or it's members WILL NOT be held
responsible for what you do with the information within this text document.
We cannot take responsibility for your ignorance, besides, we can barely
take responsibility for our own.

    ________________________       _   _   _      _______________________
    ________________________Contact_The_UPL_Today!_______________________

	linear ................................ lord_linear@juno.com
	Jaded ............................... lord_jaded@hotmail.com
	Jc ........................................ uplxjc@yahoo.com
	ec caco .............................. el.caco@jewishmal.com

                           Official UPL Homepage:                           
                   http://www.unitedphonelosers.zzn.com                      
    ___________   _   _    _     _   _         _  _   _ _    ____________
    ___________Hey_You_Punk_Kids!_The_Telephone_Is_NOT_A_Toy!____________